Author: Marie Confudere

District Attorney Sues Family Therapist

BOSTON, MA—Henry Valentino, the well-known state prosecutor, has sued his family therapist for ruining his career as a district attorney. Before undergoing therapy, Valentino was known as one of the toughest DAs in the state, earning the nickname “The Hammer” for his relentless persecution and occasional courtroom beatings of accused criminals, their family and supporters. That all changed earlier this year when, due to family tensions, Valentino agreed to couples therapy with a family therapist in Boston, whose name has been suppressed. A “rather chuffed” Mrs. Valentino reported to friends afterward that therapy sessions had gone well. “Henry became...

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Restricted Intake Diet Slammed By Fast Food Companies

LOS ANGELES, CA—A radical new diet called the Restricted Intake Diet is causing an uproar in the fast-food industry and has some federal politicians very concerned. The diet, commonly known as “eating in moderation”, proposes that people should only consume as many calories each day as the body needs without having to store excess as fat. “This is, quite simply, a dangerous idea,” said a spokeswoman for a major fast-food outlet. “It’s unrealistic, and possibly psychologically damaging, that people should exercise such extreme constraint in their eating habits – and furthermore, it’s un-American,” she said in a press conference yesterday to...

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Weather

Cayman Palms, Cayman Islands
May 28, 2017, 1:33 pm
Partly sunny
Partly sunny
30°C
real feel: 38°C
humidity: 65%
 

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